Desde mi tumba

De vuelta en el lodo

rápido me hundo
primero mis pies
luego mis ojos
y toco lo más profundo.

Se me hace difícil
distinguir el como,
cuando, donde
y sobretodo la cara
que me obligó
a permanecer encerrada.

Las lentas horas pasan
y se transforman en largos años,
y aquí sigo
enterrada, raptada
y sobretodo violada.

Y quiero gritar
pedir ayuda una vez más
pero
¿y si nadie me escucha?
¿y si resulta que el mundo
está demasiado ocupado
mirando para otro lado?

A veces veo voces
y oigo luces por fuera
de este oscuro ataúd
que prometen rescatarme
de entre el barro
y la mala hierba
y me invade la culpa
el pensar que al callarme,
y preferir conformarme
con mi linda cajita
estoy colaborando
a que él siga moldeando
nuevos cadáveres andantes. 

Sui Caedere

I did it

I was planning it

long time ago,

and finally did it

I cutted my veins

slowly and carefuly,

multiple times

while crying and begging

for God to stop my life.

Desperation maybe,

things already lived,

and the thought that

even worst things

are going to happen

to me...

Looking for redemption,

I let the blood flow

I stained the sheets

and felt asleep

after taken lot of pills

Neither the blood,

nor the pills,

nor even Death

took my life.

I woke up

next morning,

birds singing

sun shining

wounds hurting

and head aching

the phone rang

and I picked it up.

It was my mom,

- told me she had

a terrible nightmare

and stayed all night

awaken,

praying for her

only daughter

to be saved

I wont forget

my mom's cries

when she accidentaly

discovered the blood

and the marks.

There are,

there still are,

things to fight for,

new ilusions to find,

new quests to follow

and people that wait

your return home.

We live in a place

sometimes called earth

sometimes called hell

but at least

we know it well.

I dont care who saved me

or where does he or she come from

but thank you

for this second chance.

Picture: Requiem por un suicidio by Carlos Entefí

Gracias